Supporting children through loss: Parent tips

Losing someone we love is incredibly difficult. Explaining death to children can feel especially hard, particularly while parents are coping with their own grief at the same time.

Families in our community shared some thoughtful experiences of supporting their children through loss. Their stories show that while every family is different, small, gentle approaches can really help.

Here are some of the ideas parents shared.

1. Use clear, simple language

Several parents said that using clear and honest language helped avoid confusion. Words like “passed away” or “gone to sleep” can sometimes be misunderstood, so many chose to simply say the person died and explain that their body stopped working.

One parent shared how they prepared their young son when his baby cousin was very ill, explaining that the doctors couldn’t make him better and that he would die. Being clear helped him understand what was happening and allowed him to talk about it.

2. Visual supports can help understanding

Visual tools can make difficult ideas easier to process.

One family shared that their daughter’s school created a social story when her grandfather became seriously ill, and then updated it when he died. Having something visual to revisit helped reinforce the message and support her understanding.

Photo books or pictures of the person can also help children recognise and remember them.

3. Keep memories alive in simple ways

Many families found comfort in creating small ways to remember the person.

Some children had photo books they could look at whenever they wanted. Others kept special objects connected to the person they lost, like a soft toy or keepsake.

These small reminders can help children feel connected and keep the person part of family conversations.

4. Let children talk and ask questions

Grief isn’t a one-time conversation. Children may return to the topic again and again as their understanding grows.

Parents shared that allowing their child to talk about the person whenever they wanted helped them process their feelings.

Sometimes children also show incredible empathy. One parent shared how their son offered cuddles to family members during a very difficult time.

5. It’s okay for children to see sadness

Some parents worried about showing their emotions, but many found it helpful to be honest.

Letting children know “I’m sad because I miss them” can help them understand their own feelings and see that sadness is a natural part of grief.

A gentle reminder 💛

Every child understands death differently, and there is no perfect way to explain it. Honest conversations, reassurance and keeping memories alive can all help.

Thank you to the parents who shared such personal experiences. Your openness helps other families feel less alone. 💛