Sharing the News: Real-parent tips

Sharing with friends and family that your baby has Down syndrome can feel like a huge step. For many parents, it’s an emotional time filled with love, uncertainty, and sometimes mixed reactions from others. There’s no “right” way to do it – only the way that feels best for you and your family.

We asked parents in our community how they chose to share the news. Here’s what they told us:

1. Finding the words that feel right

Some parents chose to share their news through a carefully written message:

“We have recently learned that our sweet baby has Down syndrome. Of course this news has left us overwhelmed. We are still adjusting. One thing we know for sure: we absolutely love our baby, and we hope you will join us in welcoming our extra special little one.”

Taking time to put thoughts into words can help others understand how you’re feeling and how you’d like them to respond.

2. Telling the people you trust first

Many parents began with their closest circle – those who had already shown love and acceptance.

“I told my closest friends and my parents first. They never apologised or treated him any different than our daughter, and it made my heart feel less scared.”

Leaning on people who make you feel safe can give you strength before sharing more widely.

3. Waiting until you’re ready

For some, the news was shared quickly, while others waited until they had adjusted and felt more confident.

“We told close family while our little one was in NICU. Later, when we’d had time to accept the news and learn more about Down syndrome, we shared more widely. By then, we felt able to explain how much we loved our baby and didn’t want sympathy.”

There’s no timetable – your journey is your own.

4. Giving yourself space

A few parents described the importance of taking a pause before telling others. Taking time to soak in the ‘newness’ and wonder of your baby, without feeling pressure to update everyone straight away, can make those first hours and days even more precious.

5. Sharing with openness (and a little humour)

Some families found that honesty, and even humour, helped them and others to adjust:

“Best response was from my mum who has autism. She just said, ‘Well, he’s a baby like all the others’ – and went on to treat him exactly the same.”

Not every reaction will be perfect, but the love and acceptance of others can mean everything.

6. Using social media when the time feels right

For several parents, posting online allowed them to share their feelings clearly and set the tone for how they wanted others to respond:

“I made it clear that we weren’t to be apologised to, that he was still a healthy baby, and that we loved him very much.”

A gentle reminder 💛

Every family’s experience is different. Some people may react with warmth, others may not know what to say. What matters most is that you do things in your own time, in the way that feels right for you.

Here at DSUK, we are with you for every step of the way. Our community is a safe space where you can share openly, ask questions and connect with families who truly understand.

If you’re facing this moment, please remember: you are not alone. Many parents have stood where you are and want you to know – your baby is deeply loved, and you will find your own way forward.